AHHHH! (for lack of a better word)
Amidst all the catch up work I have to do, not to mention just personl stuff, I find myself needing to journal.My mother in law just left town. Can I just say ....
THANK YOU!!!!
I know that is horrible, but my wonderful husband and I were so desperate for this day and I think it began almost from the moment she got here. Not sure what it was this time. Usually it is my husband that is much more irritated than I. But, this time, I joined the misery party. I just couldn't tolerate as well as I usually can. I couldn't focus on all the positives. And there are many positives, but there are also MANY negatives. And this deemed a serious problem this time for my sanity.
In the past, with each visit my mother in law makes, something in the household goes wrong. Whether it is smoke detectors going off randomly, faucets not working, animals acting strange, weird experiences with people around us - just stuff.
With most visits, something happens with the animals. Like the dogs throwing up or like the time Molly got kennel cough. This time, we've had a few big inconveniences. First off, Logan was not his usual self. He would get very unhappy very easily and this was not what we were used to. Granted, he IS a toddler and has a few toddler moments and tantrums a day. But, they are usually very short-lived and he is easily consolable and responds to discilpine very well.
Enter grandma from Alabama. Since she got here, his once healthy appetite was gone. His whining kicked in to the tune of a child I don't even know. His temper has heightened. He did this weird cry one day while we were out and fussed about everything we did. Just not his usual easy to please self. Did turning 20 months with new developmental frustrations kick in the exact moment she arrived? Oh and because of all this extra energy he is exerting telling us how unhappy he is, he's napping like 3 hours, which he hasn't done since he was like 6 months old. (which of course is not something to complain about - just interesting) Now he's back to about1 1/2 to 2 hours.
Next.
Worms and moths. We got meal moths and worms in our pantry and had to empty everything. We had to throw food away (like throwing money away) and then we had to wash down the whole pantry with bleach and ziplock all good food.
Next.
The dogs. Max got diarreah about 5 different places in the house. The cat, who has not even coughed up a furball (she swallows them) or vomitted since the day we got her 7 years ago, puked in 3 different rooms and pooped in my closet and laundry room. The last time and only time she ever had any sort of an accident was the last time MIL was out and she peed on our bed and ruined our day old new comforter which is now history as the smell never came out and washing it ruined it.
Next.
My mood. My mood has been on irritation high and it felt like there was virtually nothing I could do to releive the tension headache she caused me. So why? Why the irritation? Because for 7 years I have been told the same negative stories of all the drama in her life and of all 4 husbands and I am over it. I know my husbands father left her for her best friend. I know every freakin detail of it. I practically lived it myself by now. I don't need it anymore.
Sure, life's not fair sometimes and we get in crap situations. But, you move on. She moved on. She has a great husband now and a life with no drama. But, because she loves drama, she keeps rehashing the negative in her life and does not ever focus on the positive. The now. Only focuses on the past. She has so much anger and resentment still harbored and she knows it and she just says that she can't help it and that that is who she is. Well, yes, you can help it. She's also a very jealous person and she admits this too. I told her that holding grudges and getting so angry is an ugly quality. I had hoped, that, she having been a model and all about being glamorous and wanting so bad to be regarded as a Scarlett O'Hara, would think, "Hmm, don't want to be ugly." But, she didn't care. My husband calls her out on EVERYTHING. I love it. He doesn't let her get away with her games and is actually happy now that I am sharing in the irritation because misery loves company.
And one last thing, amongst the endless annoying things and occurences this trip. I am fed up with her silent attitude towards my parents. My parents have practically bent over backwards trying to make her insecure self feel welcome and everytime she is with them she plays the silent treatment and embarrasses me and my husband. She sits through a really nice expensive dinner that they treat us all to, with silence. Myabe a grin here or there. It's so annoying and so rude.
Everything she accuses her other son of, is what she is and she just can't see it.
Ok, enough of that. I really need to let this visit go.
I jsut can't help but be annoyed that she will be here for the birth of the "baby girl she always wanted" and wants to stay to help out. But, she didn't help out this time. She can't even hold Logan because she complains that everything hurts. I will already have my mom and to be honest. This is going to be a big deal and big adjustment for Logan and he already didn't take to her. so I can't see how her being here will be of any help.
She mentioned staying here a month when the baby comes. My husband laughed at her and told her, "no way!" We are getting her a ticket to come out a few days before the due date (if baby comes before then - Oh well). We are booking the ticket so that we can change the dates so that she is out of here after I get home from the hospital. And that's that.
I am not a confrontational person, but I have been brought to the brink. I am not going to be a push over and play nice at the expense of my family's sanity.
Whew! Needed to vent that.
Ok, next post will be more positive. Just needed to get that out. More updates later on this kicking, rolling baby girl and this new little person Logan has become.
THANK YOU!!!!
I know that is horrible, but my wonderful husband and I were so desperate for this day and I think it began almost from the moment she got here. Not sure what it was this time. Usually it is my husband that is much more irritated than I. But, this time, I joined the misery party. I just couldn't tolerate as well as I usually can. I couldn't focus on all the positives. And there are many positives, but there are also MANY negatives. And this deemed a serious problem this time for my sanity.
In the past, with each visit my mother in law makes, something in the household goes wrong. Whether it is smoke detectors going off randomly, faucets not working, animals acting strange, weird experiences with people around us - just stuff.
With most visits, something happens with the animals. Like the dogs throwing up or like the time Molly got kennel cough. This time, we've had a few big inconveniences. First off, Logan was not his usual self. He would get very unhappy very easily and this was not what we were used to. Granted, he IS a toddler and has a few toddler moments and tantrums a day. But, they are usually very short-lived and he is easily consolable and responds to discilpine very well.
Enter grandma from Alabama. Since she got here, his once healthy appetite was gone. His whining kicked in to the tune of a child I don't even know. His temper has heightened. He did this weird cry one day while we were out and fussed about everything we did. Just not his usual easy to please self. Did turning 20 months with new developmental frustrations kick in the exact moment she arrived? Oh and because of all this extra energy he is exerting telling us how unhappy he is, he's napping like 3 hours, which he hasn't done since he was like 6 months old. (which of course is not something to complain about - just interesting) Now he's back to about1 1/2 to 2 hours.
Next.
Worms and moths. We got meal moths and worms in our pantry and had to empty everything. We had to throw food away (like throwing money away) and then we had to wash down the whole pantry with bleach and ziplock all good food.
Next.
The dogs. Max got diarreah about 5 different places in the house. The cat, who has not even coughed up a furball (she swallows them) or vomitted since the day we got her 7 years ago, puked in 3 different rooms and pooped in my closet and laundry room. The last time and only time she ever had any sort of an accident was the last time MIL was out and she peed on our bed and ruined our day old new comforter which is now history as the smell never came out and washing it ruined it.
Next.
My mood. My mood has been on irritation high and it felt like there was virtually nothing I could do to releive the tension headache she caused me. So why? Why the irritation? Because for 7 years I have been told the same negative stories of all the drama in her life and of all 4 husbands and I am over it. I know my husbands father left her for her best friend. I know every freakin detail of it. I practically lived it myself by now. I don't need it anymore.
Sure, life's not fair sometimes and we get in crap situations. But, you move on. She moved on. She has a great husband now and a life with no drama. But, because she loves drama, she keeps rehashing the negative in her life and does not ever focus on the positive. The now. Only focuses on the past. She has so much anger and resentment still harbored and she knows it and she just says that she can't help it and that that is who she is. Well, yes, you can help it. She's also a very jealous person and she admits this too. I told her that holding grudges and getting so angry is an ugly quality. I had hoped, that, she having been a model and all about being glamorous and wanting so bad to be regarded as a Scarlett O'Hara, would think, "Hmm, don't want to be ugly." But, she didn't care. My husband calls her out on EVERYTHING. I love it. He doesn't let her get away with her games and is actually happy now that I am sharing in the irritation because misery loves company.
And one last thing, amongst the endless annoying things and occurences this trip. I am fed up with her silent attitude towards my parents. My parents have practically bent over backwards trying to make her insecure self feel welcome and everytime she is with them she plays the silent treatment and embarrasses me and my husband. She sits through a really nice expensive dinner that they treat us all to, with silence. Myabe a grin here or there. It's so annoying and so rude.
Everything she accuses her other son of, is what she is and she just can't see it.
Ok, enough of that. I really need to let this visit go.
I jsut can't help but be annoyed that she will be here for the birth of the "baby girl she always wanted" and wants to stay to help out. But, she didn't help out this time. She can't even hold Logan because she complains that everything hurts. I will already have my mom and to be honest. This is going to be a big deal and big adjustment for Logan and he already didn't take to her. so I can't see how her being here will be of any help.
She mentioned staying here a month when the baby comes. My husband laughed at her and told her, "no way!" We are getting her a ticket to come out a few days before the due date (if baby comes before then - Oh well). We are booking the ticket so that we can change the dates so that she is out of here after I get home from the hospital. And that's that.
I am not a confrontational person, but I have been brought to the brink. I am not going to be a push over and play nice at the expense of my family's sanity.
Whew! Needed to vent that.
Ok, next post will be more positive. Just needed to get that out. More updates later on this kicking, rolling baby girl and this new little person Logan has become.
posted by Best Known As Logan's Mom | 3:12 PM
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