RUSH RUSH RUSH

Sometimes you have those days where you just sit back and enjoy each moment. A shower could last forever, bath time with Logan is endless fun that could last hours and I wouldn't know, morning walks with beautiful weather, chirping birds and a 1 year old barking at all the dogs that go by could go for miles and miles and time stops in the evening so that I can read my friends blogs and journals and a good book.

Then there are those other days. The kind where your cat digs through a clean litterbox hoping to get someone to acknowledge her at 5:30 in the morning so that she can get her morning treat and in doing so wakes up the baby. The kind where no matter how fast you go or how organized you try to be, you're still late to a family outing, still forgot 1 or 2 necessary baby items in the diaper bag and baby missing a nap is fine by you because you get to put him to bed early and though you love the bajangles out of him, bed time can't come quicker on days like these. You look forward to the time where you can just sit at the computer and write or read and just relax the rest of the evening.

Ok, I am talking about my day. And though it was a very nice day. I felt rushed through it. And even after I put Logan to bed, I was still filled with a bit of jitterbug. I couldn't totally let go. I start to read and I get sidetracked and feel rushed. But, for what? He went to bed a 5pm out of total exhaustion and I have what? 4 plus hours to do whatever and one being cleaning the bird cage. So what's the rush?

There is none. But, that's why I came to write. It calms me down. And after being calm I can go and snuggle with my husband and have dinner.

I would really like to write on a daily basis. There are many handwritten journals I have from, I don't know, highschool. Journals through college. Journals of when I lived in Europe. Journals of when I met my husband and of course my internet journals. And I actually go back and read them on occassion.

Sometimes I feel rushed with overwhelming thoughts. So many things that I want to put my attention towards. So many projects in the making and none are completed. (finish book, finish re-write of other book for business, paint deck, clean out office desk, plant flowers . . .) Then there are the others. (call mom you met at Gymboree, call mom you met at park, return email of other mom you met at dr. office, get haircut, get dog's cut, trim Logan's nails . . .)

My mind is like a checklist.

For now, the top of this checklist will be to sit with my husband and have dinner and relax. The rest can wait till tomorrow.